SEXUAL TOPICS: THE IMPORTANCE OF TALKING TO YOUR PARTNER

For many people nowadays, especially the younger ones, sex isn’t something to think about or talk about, it’s just something to experience. 

However, if you want to maintain a stable and rewarding relationship, sexuality shouldn’t only be experienced. But also talked about achieving a better understanding of the couple and achieving a good performance in intimacy, which satisfies both! Let’s talk about Sex topics!

Sexual topics you should talk about with your partner

1. Sexual frequency

Do you feel that you want more intimate encounters than you have? Or do you prefer less, but with higher quality? Don’t be silent, talk to your partner, and negotiate, because the frequency of sexual relationship generates many difficulties: “I want more, you don’t give me as much”! 

Reach agreements, but don’t become passive spectators of the deterioration of extraordinary sexuality at the beginning of the relationship, to a routinized sexuality. 

And remember: Don’t have sex just to fulfill a requirement, but because you want it!

🤔 Do you know what asexuality is?

2. Practices and forms

Talk about the sexual practices you like best and about those that aren’t making you feel comfortable, and say what others you aren’t willing to experiment with in your sex life. 

Discuss the forms of stimulation, the how, the where, and what you like. Places, clothing, whether with the light on or off.  If they prefer to be told nice words or swear words during sex. If they love a slow, fast, or rough rhythm. 

3. Taboos and fears

There are forbidden subjects in a relationship, and they should be talked about, such as whether the couple masturbates. Almost always couples end up individually masturbating because it’s taboo to tell their partner and sometimes it’s valid to know because on many occasions, the same couple can help and this can be healthy for the relationship. 

Even sex itself isn’t talked about because it’s considered dirty, sinful, and embarrassing to talk about it. It’s necessary to overcome these prejudices. If you are a person who talks freely with your partner about sex, it will allow you to know how your body works, what you like in sex, and how often you prefer, and that is key!

4.  Pleasure triggers

Inquire about that sexual form or practice that sparks the other and detonates his or her pleasure, to allow you to conclude at the end that you had a very good performance. Start by getting to know your erogenous zones to explore and get to know those of the other!

Keep in mind that you can’t only reach orgasm through penetration.  Many couples seek orgasm only through penetration, but it can also be achieved through oral sex, self-masturbation or mutual masturbation, or with the help of a sex toy. All other possibilities of reaching orgasm should be discussed for a better sexual experience!

5. Body changes

When people feel unattractive, have put on weight, feel they have a defective body, or have gone through difficult body experiences, it affects their sexual performance and they limit themselves. 

Rather than talk, they choose to shy away from relationships, to not undress, to cover themselves with the blanket, to not take off all their clothes, and to remain with the light off. So you have to talk openly, with total nudity, about the changes in your body, about your self-worth. 

This is one of the most uncomfortable and least possible dialogues, but it’s very useful at the time of the game and the sexual preambles are so interesting.

6. Dysfunctionality

When disorders such as low sexual desire, erection problems, premature ejaculation, anorgasmia (absence or insufficiency of orgasms), or vaginal dryness appear, don’t make decisions such as avoiding sex or making your partner think that you no longer love her or that you have another partner. 

Generally, when these issues are discussed it’s too late, the relationship has been broken because of mistaken imaginaries!

7. A third party in the relationship

A third party in the relationship should be discussed: is a sex toy welcome, how regularly, only for special occasions, how willing am I to fulfill my partner’s sexual fantasy, or to receive a third person in bed? 

All of these sex questions need to be discussed. Fantasies, for example, generate a lot of pleasure and keep the relationship from falling into sexual monotony, which is the enemy of couples. But to invite a friend, for example, to conjugal intimacy, is a topic of conversation that must be had and agreed upon in advance as also, as to dialogue about its possible disastrous consequences. Talk, negotiate, don’t decide alone, and don’t impose.

8. Exclusivity and safe sex

Don’t assume or take for granted that just because you are intimate, your partner owes you exclusivity. Talk about it and negotiate, because the other may not be willing to be so ‘exclusive’, and you may not be willing to share it. 

There are trends in sexuality and one of them is to include a third party in the relationship or to exchange partners, in this type of experience it’s better to establish clear rules. 

❤️ What is an open relationship? Differences with poly ones!

It’s also necessary to talk about the methods to use to have safe sex, and about the fear of a sexually transmitted disease. This sets an important tone in the sexual dynamic!